User talk:Christoph Schrader/Magic Page Specimen

Christoph Schrader - When I think of Winter, I see a Happiness that cannot end. TALK - I would be delighted to talk. This is a propounded format for magic pages based upon an alterration of the existing one. The Holy spell has been chosen for purposes of this specimen as its page is, at present, incomplete, though this sample does not quite fill in all of the gaps that have been left open and more information still shall be necessary for its completion. It is generally modelled upon the existing spell pages, but with additions based upon those used at Aselia and owing to the mistaken use of the word "etymology" to mean the origin of the spell, and not the word itself. The reasoning behind the etymology is that words often carry interesting past meanings that may not be apparent from the present one, and that might shed a bit more light upon why this word was chosen to name the spell and not some other. Please leave any comments and suggestions for improvement following the explanation, but do not edit the page itself without my permission.

Explanation

Learning

This section explains how the spell is learnt in each game in which it appears.

Recipe

If it has one, this section should include the recipe required to unlock the spell in Days or Birth By Sleep.

Casting

This section should contain where and how the spell appears in each game in the series, including a brief description of what it does when cast.

Enemies who use it

This section, self-evidently, lists enemies who use a certain sort of magic. It should be given in the order of Heartless, Nobodies, Unversed, and Bosses.

Other Uses

This section contains other uses of the spell's name that do not directly relate to casting it, and may include subheadings such as synthesis materials and gummy blocks.

Origin

This section contains two subsections -- one explaining its origins in the Final Fantasy series if the spell is not unique to Kingdom Hearts, and another detailing the etymology of the word, or its history as a part of the English language.

Quotes

This section contains quotes by casters of the spell in question said specifically in connection with said spell, and no other quotes should be included.

Trivia

This section contains, as it does anywhere else, a list of random bits of data on the subject.

Comments and Suggestions

• "semi-recurring" doesn't make sense.
• The third and fourth lines in the lead are waffling.
• The Learning lines for CoM and ReCoM are needlessly long.
• The Casting for BBS mentions Salvation, which is irrelevant.
• The bit about the Holy-G is completely irrelevant to this page, and redundant to the actual Gummi's page.
• The Angel Star bit is needless, and since it says "holy" rather than "Holy", speculative.
• The Kingdom Hearts II section is much, much too long. All it need say is that Minnie and Mickey can cast it, and possibly describe how it works.
• "Enemies who use" has always been a terrible section, and absolutely should not be on the final page.
• The "Quotes" section is pointless filler.
• The second trivia point is missing words, or placed wrong.
• The third trivia point is completely irrelevant to KH, and even if it was, it should be in the etymology.

In general, the format we have now (1) describes what the attack does in the lead, (2) describes how to get it, and (3) describes what the name means. That's all the actual information about a technique there is - as shown here, anything else you try to throw in ends up being waffling, filler, or otherwise completely irrelevant.Glorious CHAOS! 03:31, September 29, 2010 (UTC)

I accept your criticisms, though I disagree with several.

Salvation is relevant, since it does the same thing, just as abilities that use the same attribute as the Fire, Blizzard, Thunder, and Aero spells are relevant on those pages.

The Angel Star also appears to use light-based magic, making it relevant.

I disagree about the enemies who use it being irrelevant. Some enemies have a certain elemental theme, for example, such as Roxas with Light, Jaffar Genie with Fire, and so forth.

The second trivia point is missing a word, though it was a mistake I believed I had corrected.

What a technique does and how to obtain it are the basic points of information about it.

You are also, quite frankly, tactless. What is more, you say to tell what the name means, but criticise me for providing its origin? Please, do be more consistent. Individual usages of a word within certain media do not constitute an etymology. The etymology of the word "holy" is its history as a part of the English language -- it is the direct descendant of the Middle English "hooly", which is, in turn, a descendant of Old English "halig", both of which sound very nearly like the word as it is now pronounced. You also know that I am perfectly aware of your opinion of my formatting this page, and so restating it here strikes me as a want of self-control and a tendency to think your opinion above that of anybody else. Please kindly remember that it is not, and that I do not appreciate being so addressed on my own talk page. Christoph ^{I am all ears.} 17:54, September 29, 2010 (UTC)